ADOPTaMOM.COM Page 7

ADOPTaMOM.COM Page 7

What is Obsessive compulsive behavior? This can be doing too much of a right or a wrong thing. It could be an action that was done on an impulse without thinking through the consequences. As an example, you may stay in bed and sleep too much or sit around and watch TV and feel sorry for yourself for one reason or another. You may wash your hands thirty or forty times a day and take four or five showers a day because you are afraid of germs. You dwell on your problems without taking action to solve them. You may be expecting someone else to magically come along and solve your problems for you. Don't count on it! This is not likely to occur. Everyone else has their own problems that they need to deal with and only you are ultimately responsible for correcting the situation. You may also go and do things and not think of the consequences of the action. You end up doing things that you are sorry you did and then you want to blame others for your own actions or inactions. Face the truth: ONLY YOU can be responsible for your actions. If you try to blame others, you are showing you immaturity and unwillingness to be responsible for your actions. Overeating and starving yourself are two more examples. The following books may be of assistance.

How important is my diet to my health? You are the sum total of what you eat. Everyone should eat a balanced diet that contains all of the vitamins, minerals, and protein that are required to maintain a healthy body. You should NEVER consider doing fad diets without first checking with a doctor. Many doctors will give you sample diets that they recommend. Fad diets can generate self-inflicted problems. Here are some books that may assist you with losing weight. Almost everyone, including me are guilty today of not getting enough exercise.

Back to menu What are self-inflicted problems? Some people will cause themselves harm by purposely hurting themselves. People that do this may also try to blame other people because they do not want to take responsibility for their actions. This may be done when the person has lost their love or respect for themselves. The person will deny that they are doing this to themselves. Self-inflicted problems can also be caused by not eating a proper diet because of a lack of respect for oneself or by not knowing what the proper foods to eat while on the diet. Other poor choices such as taking drugs, drinking and smoking can lead to self-inflicted problems. This can be a serious situation and professional help may be necessary.

Why should I not use off-color language? Off-color language can be used as a tool to lash out at others. A person that has mastered the english language can be more effective in presenting their side of an argument without using off-color language. Peer pressure can cause someone to use off-color language, but again, by just saying "NO" to participating, you will earn the respect of others and become a leader. Using this language is being disrespectful of yourself and those that hear you use it.
Your own friends will respect you less if they hear you use off-color language, but they may not say anything to you. They may quietly decide that you are not a friend that they desire to be around because of your actions and will just stop seeing you as often. They may also tell others about your poor conduct and others will respect you less. The following books may be of assistance in learning how to curb your tongue.

Back to menu Why didn't you abort me? If you are saying this, it is showing that you have a problem with your own self-respect and you are trying to push the blame off on me. By trying to push the blame off on me, it is showing that you do not wish to be responsible for yourself and your own actions. You have to love and respect yourself before you can love and respect others. Having an abortion is the killing of a human being. Those that do have abortions have a lack of respect for themselves and a respect for life. Many abortions are because of sex outside of marriage. That is just one reason that there should not be sex before marriage. If a woman does have an unwanted pregnancy and does not wish to take on the commitment and responsibility of raising the child, the child should be put up for adoption. There are many couples that want to have children but can not do so. If you know of someone that has had an abortion, the following book may be of assistance in dealing with the abortion.

Why do children need restrictions? Children as they grow up need restrictions as to what they can and can not do. As they grow, restrictions are designed to keep them from making wrong decisions because of a lack of maturity or knowledge. As they grow, they will learn to make their own decisions based on their growing maturity and knowledge. The parent will remove restrictions once the child has demonstrated that they can make responsible decisions and are willing to take on the consequences of a wrong decision. When the child makes a wrong decision and then tries to blame others for it, they are showing a lack of personal responsibility for their own actions and should have more restrictions placed back on them. When the child starts driving a car, a moment’s indecision or the wrong decision can lead to injury or death of others or themselves. A child must demonstrate that they are willing to take responsibility for their own actions before they are allowed behind the wheel of a car.

Back to menu How do I handle criticism? Criticism from others can be very hard to take and it is possible that it should be ignored. Criticism can also be dealt out as way to blame others because they do not want to take responsibility for their own problems. Don't criticize others unless you are prepared to take criticism yourself. If the criticism is based on fact, take it in a positive manner and use it to modify your actions so you will become a wiser, better person. This book may be of help when dealing with criticism.

I want more freedom! Giving you freedom allows you to grow. You have to remember that freedom also requires you to take responsibility for your actions. You should also realize that you should respect the right for others to have their freedom, also. Too much freedom can also backfire. You need to demonstrate that you know how to make intelligent choices. These books may assist with understanding freedom.

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